letter to my students

I love teaching my students...
I learn a lot from them...
Knowledge is a gift from god...

I always abandon myself before...
I want to make people happy...
I want to make my parents happy...
I want to make everyone happy...
I do my very best to all the people that i know...
I want to give the best to people as well as what I want the best for myself...

but...
I was hurt...
I was suffer...
I cried everyday...
I was tired...

Now,
Here I am...
Talking to you...
Teaching you...
Loving you...

All that I have is myself...
I want to listen to myself sincerely...
I want to be a philosopher...
I want to be a good Muslim...
I want to be happy...
I want to learn from my past...
I want to be better...

I am really grateful that I am alive now...
I am happy to know you...
I am happy to work hard...
I am happy to remain strong...

When my tears drop...
I keep telling myself,
YANA, BE STRONG!
YANA, YOU CAN DO THIS!
YANA, YOU ARE SPECIAL!

Even I fail so many times, cry really hard, regret and down!
I always get up and work...
I NEVER STOP!
I will never stop!
till my life ends...

Life hard?
=_="
Just don't blame people...
I hate myself when I blame people for my sickness...
I hate myself when I blame people when I am hurt...
I hate myself when I blame people for my failures...
I hate myself when I blame people for my stupidity...

I BLAME MYSELF!
SO, THAT I WORK HARDER!!!

I believe in what I want....
I always dream about it...
I do many jobs and I am not stop...
I want to challenge myself...

So, that...
I can tell my students...

live and stay alive...
Allah with you...

I am doing my best to study, teach and learn from my students...
When you are improved...
I am improved too...
When you can make sense with my lesson...
I can teach other students and improve myself...
When you fail...'
I am a loser...

All I do is to be as responsible as I can to all of you...
I try my very best!
I pray for all of you in my prayer...
because I know exactly how it feels when I fail and not achieve something...
I know how it feels when people don't want to listen...
I know how it feels when people cannot understand my writing...
I know it's not easy....

never stop!
knowledge is all about the arriving of makna!